Really tired from church today...
Even though not doing anything today...but...I felt tired...
Learnt some PA skills...Next time wanna be sitting at the back...tuning the volume...fixing the mic...taking some naps...XD
It will be good for my ear training oso...I can hear some little tiny voice that the person who is teaching me can't...Cool....Maybe tatz wad u get when u join the band...
Fun in the PA room...but...stand through the whole service...Wow...After that...My legs was wobling...like jelly....

Agape...
Phew...........
Really need some makeovers...
It needs a restart...
Revolution...
Renew...
Upgrade...
Organize...
Efficiency...
Youth spirit!!!
And most...
The presence of God...
Tatz wad we need...
Today's activity...well...The sharing was really really interesting...2V...Verify...Velidate...Sien Lerk thought us why...and how...should we find out the truth of the information we receive nowadays...
Well...REALLY useful in our lives...great lesson indeed...BUT...only about 10++ little cats (including me) attended this fruitful event...Oh ya...not to mention last week...GAMES...oso...the people attended was only 10++...Where are all the young energetic youths!!! WE SHOULD BE RUNNING THIS PLACE!!!
Speaking of running...
phew...............
At year start...things was quite OK....
Slowly...and gradually throughout the year...
Ppl starts to get missing...
P&W starts to get messy...
No one seems to care for the new comers...
Exams starts to come...
Empty seats starts to emerge...
Well...It's 30th November...
And wow...Ain't this a riot party!
When I got to church this morning...Someone suddenly came and told me that Im the P&W ldr for today...
O.o
Who made the table out and didn't go and tell the next person in advance!?
Somemore I need to go for meeting...Can't even put up a team for P&W...
Good thing there's Xiao Ern to save the day...
Asked her to help....then helped her to find songs...find LCD...find computer...find pianist...
Phew...............
Well...
After I join the committee...
Revolution time...



The age of long and hard band practice has finally reached...
Hope my lips will survive...

It's been a real fruitful day...or should I say stomach-full day...
Granpa took all of us to Bukit Jugra...Somewhere at Banting...
The "Beggar's Restauran" isn't really wad I've expected...
Granpa said that it's really hard to book a table there...
They are full everyday...
So...I thought they would be quite...up to speed with their popularity...
They weren't.....
The restaurant is basically made of wood and planks...
It's located in somewhere far from the city...
Up on the hill...
With lovely nature around it...
It ain't "airconded" oso...
Granpa said that when he first went there to eat...There aren't proper tables there!!! The tables back then was made outta wood...Made by THEMSELVES...Their chairs as well...We were lucky to be enjoying our lunch on a solid table...laying back on a plastic chair...
Now to the point...
Food...
Beggar's Chicken...
Beggar's Pork...
Beggar's Pork intestine...
Soup of Eternal life...
Above is the menu of our lunch today...
And some other lala zaza...
The chicken is...INDESCRIBABLE DELICIOUS...
The pork...and the intestine...and the soup...is oso...MMmm...MMmm..Mmmmm....
We didn't waste our 1 hour trip to travel to that place....juz to taste the delicious...
It's worth it...is all I can say...

Our trip to Banting didn't stop there...
We oso went to a beach...Which we don't know...Found that place by accident...
The sand was smooth and clean...
The environment isn't really polluted...
Quite nice beach...Muz be a newly developed beach...
Hope it stays that pretty...

Then...
On our way home...
We stopped at a kopitiam...
It's runned by a fren of our family...
His coffee...Oso...MMmmmm....



X= Tan Xun...My cousin brother
B=Boss...the person running the kopitiam...

Grandma: Who wans coffee??!!
Sis & Cousin sis & Bro: I wan!!!
X: I oso wan!!!
*Grandma starts to count...*
X: Wait!!! What coffee izit???
B: Black coffee...very nice de!!!
X: huh....I wan white coffee leh...got white coffee or not???
B: Wad? White coffee??? Not nice de la...They are tasteless...Cannot win my black coffee...Cooked the beans by myself de ah...Muz try...Then u'll c...White coffee no use...Black coffee betta!!!
X: Huh....?? I think I wan soya bean la grandma...

Like the boss said...His black coffee definately left it's smell in my mind till now...I can't forget the sips of sweet and delicious coffee dancing on my tongue...
My sense of taste went to heaven today...



Sis finally got her handphone...*The day suddenly turns dark...wait...it's already midnite...*
Why...???
Why...?????!!!!!
The first phone she gets is a thousand...million...billion...betta than mine...
So...you might ask...why did she get it???
Actually...it's Granpa (father side...not the one who brought us to banting) who gave her the HP...for rewarding her of getting into 6M...
*sobs*
How come I nvr get this kind of treatment...
Im serious...
My heart is really...hurted...by this act...
Haiz...
Wad else can I do but to live with it...
Sometimes life is juz this unfair...
Real unfair...
Really really very unfair...



Tmr...wait...it's 12 already...
Gonna be the pianist for the choir performance later...about 10 more hours I think...
*sigh*
It's been long time since I played for the choir...
It's a comeback for me...Hope I won't throw this...




I hate the unfairness in this world...
Even though I should be looking at what I have and not looking at what others have...
But I feel this...disturbing...
It juz ain't....fair...

Gosh...
Gt a real stomach ache last nite...
Suddenly woke up in pain...and in confusion...
It's like someone poisoned me or something...
The whole world feels like spinning...
And my tummy feels like exploding...
I almost threw out...I think...
I feel like waking up in a nightmare (I was in another dream before the stomach ache hit me)...
Dreamland and reality got mixed up...
I don't know if it's a dream...or I juz probably ate the wrong thing before sleeping...

After 5 or 10 mins of agony and pain...
I flew back to dreamland...
LOL...



Today's band practice quite well...except for my lips hurting again...The bracelets kinda made a mark inside...4 holes...for 4 teeth's metal thingy...dunno wad is it called...Sooo....Coach didn't come...Dunno why...Yan Shi took his place of leading us through the practice...Very very joker style...Ask and answers herself sometimes...Funny...
I finally got the chance of playing the whole batman...Nickname for the song...Forgotten it's real full name...Haa...Paid 4 holes in my mouth for this song...Ouch...



Got to the airport (LCCT) wif mum juz now to pick up dad...Poor dad...Car crashed...Still in factory...N now the insurance says ain't gonna pay for all of it...Lame la...Still fighting to get the money needed to fix his car...Poor dad...SOoo...It's practically snoring time when we came back from the airport...1am in the early morning...or nite...wadever...Still...the traffic is quite...busy...There is still MUCH life out in the streets...I thought it's suppose to be bedtime...Everyone should have eaten their milk and cookie...brushed their teeth...listened to their bedtime story...and ran to dreamland...WHY IS EVERYBODY STILL OUTSIDE MAKING POLLUTION??? Me??? At least Im seating here in front of my laptop typing this post and not out there driving around to play...Well...Maybe everyone needa go out and pick up their dad from the airport or something...Coincidence??? I don't think soo....



Tomoro...Granpa is gonna take us out for lunch..."Beggar's Restoran"...Nice name don't you think? Granpa says it's real hard to get a seat...Especially on public holidays...U nidda book it weeks before...and you nidda be there on time or if you're late...your seat will be taken...Should be real nice...Since it's so popular...Hope I won't wake up in another round of stomach ache for that...



Commercial time...
1812 Concert!!!
18th December 2009!!!
Concert by Hin Hua High School Wind Band, Singapore Nan Yang Junior College, and Malaysia Cheong Cheng Johor Bahru...
Tickets now selling starting 30th November at the price of RM 10 each!!!



Time to visit dreamland...

Found myself staring blankly at my laptop again...
Found myself doing nothing in front of my laptop again...
I can go to sleep...
But I don't feel like it...
I feel like doing things...that doesn't mean anything...like writing this meaningless post...
I feel like...
Nothing...
My mind feels numb...unable to produce useful thoughts...
It ain't telling me..."Go to sleep"
It ain't telling me anything at all...
But there's one little voice in my head...
Small yet powerful enough to make my fingers hit and move on the keyboard...
Little yet smart enough to make out words...
I am in auto-mode...
Auto guided by the little voice...
Whereas the big parts of my mind is currently in standby mode...
Waiting...to get me to sleep...
Readying...to put on the weights on my eyelids...
Preparing...to shut down the little voice...
I remember this little voice...
This little fella helped me in various obstacles...
What? How? When? Why?
The book report on "Phantom of the Opera" that was writen by me in some day back then, in the middle of the nite juz like this...This little voice told my fingers where to put...What to do...Then...This book report went all the way to Hong Kong...
The article, Nature, which was oso writen by me in some day back then, in the middle of the nite juz like this...This little voice was still there to help my fingers...And I got a certificate for following the little voice...
This little voice...is a gift from God...
This little voice...is my inspiration...
This little voice...kept me going...
This little voice...made me write out this post...
This little voice...became louder...
Now that I found the little voice...
It'll no longer be a little voice...
It's now a louder voice in my head...
Now...
It doesn't act like the little voice it used to be...
It's telling me to sleep...
It's putting weights on my eyelids...
It's starting to let go of my fingers...
Maybe it should still be the little voice...
Maybe it should still be hidden at some part of my mind...waiting to come and guide my finger some other midnites...
I should juz leave the little voice where it should be...
Swimming around in my mind as it likes...
When delighted...It'll come back...It'll always be there....



*I simply wrote this...Juz like wad the article said...I was juz following my mind...Typing blindly mostly...Don't nidda take it serious...*

Im going to put band events top 5 on my list now...
Top 1 will nvr change...It be our heavenly father...although sometimes...ya...u know...
Top 2...My friends and family!
Top 3...My dear piano...
Top 4...My dear laptop...Oso the one that keeps on pushing to the first...
Feels great to be back playing my clarinet...
Even brought it back to house...
Seems like my lips are really really weak now...
My fingers are a bit numb...
My lung capacity...shrunken I think...
I took a very very big step BACK...since PMR exam...
Since that exam I didn't went back for practice...
One step of time...A huge step back taken by me...
Rmb this quote made by me...
U nvr know...

Well...
These few dayz can't wake up late in the afternoon now...
In fact...
Gotta wake up early...8 o' clock...Gosh~
How can I get my needed sleep...




During todays section practice...
We went to fruity for lunch...
Gosh...
I only brought RM 10...
Almost pokai...Ate an oversized sandwich only...Well...it kept me full for a while...
Not until we decided to walk back to school...
Walk 1km++ at 1pm...
Well...it's only like tat...
But when you don't get enuf food...
LOL
I digested all the sandwich I ate juz now...
The trip to Fruity was a waste...since there was nothing left in my stomach when I got back to band room...Gosh...
*Note to self: Nvr go to eat at a place where you are not familliar with taking only RM 10 with you...And nvr...walk long distance after a sandwich lunch...you'll regret that you went to eat...*



My lips hurt from playing the clarinet too long this nite...
Ouch~

Me dad sent me an email...
The email says about a very young CEO in India...
The youngest CEO in India perhaps...
At the age of 42...same as me dad...
He died from a massive cardiac arrest...
Heart attack stroked from nowhere...
He wasn't fat...in fact he was a marathon runner...He was in great shape...Good diet...but he was the youngest CEO in India...Major pressure...Does that have to do with his sudden leaving??? The answer is no...Experts says...
His murderer is...not enuf sleep...

When I read to this point...I realize that dad doesn't like me staying up too late...
And I realize how danger izit to sleep less than 7 hours...
Normally I will sleep late...But wake up late in the morning...sometimes afternoon...



This is a weird holiday...
Really weird feeling about this holiday...

Finding...
Searching...
Looking...
For something...
To do...
In this boring week of holiday...

Heard that most of my frenz are stuck at home or else at office....poor octo...
Only this week will be a bit of boring...
Cuz nowhere to go...
After this week...It'll be practice...practice...and more practice...
Practice for band...
Practice for piano...
Practice for skit for camp...
It's gonna be real full after this boring week...
These few dayz I woke up at almost lunch time...
Mum says Im gonna be like a pig...Juz woke up then eat...then come online...then sleep again...
Bro keeps on take away my nite time...Says he's going to skul in the morning and afternoon so I can use it that time...But the second day I woke up finding him sleeping next to me...Gosh...


Practice at least 3 hours of piano everyday for this holiday!!!
Still in need of a piano teacher!!!

Firstly...
Late wishes to me mum...Happy Birthday!!! It's suppose to be yesterday (it's 12am now...considered second day)
Hope you can still be young and beautiful and filled with your motherly love...
Love ya mum...
God bless!!!

Now...
Juz watched 2012 with me family...It's pretty weird to watch a movie about the end of the world on my mum's birthday...dad said it's quite matching...生日快乐...世界末日...both have 日in it...so lame la...
Anyways...
It's pretty nice...with all those effects and stuffs...
It made me imagine what would it be like...
The movie starts by showing the weird signs starting from 2009...
Which is THIS year...
Then slowly brings out the other signs of end of the world...
Pretty amazing how they made it so real...
And more...they shooted this movie based of real facts...
Well...part facts...
Erm...maybe no facts at all...
But a civilisation...the Mayans...predicted that year...would be the end of all...
Actually to be more precise...Mayans said that it would be the end of their calendar...Nothing about the whole woohaa boom here boom there bye bye world kinda things...Their juz end their long count to that particular date...21.12.2012...End of this...Beginning of that...
Nothing is right about them...
My opinion actually...
But...something IS true about the end...
We ARE living...in the end...
The end isn't juz one day...
It's a hell of a lifetime...
We are ending...

I can't myself...to think...
Wad will happen...if tomoro is the last day of this earth...
Wad feeling do I get...
Wad will I do...
Where will I go...
Who will I look for...
Why should I be doing this!?
I should be living my life to the fullest...
I should be doing my best to make everyday meaningful...
I should be scratching my head for the answers of my exams...
I should be...before it all ends...



Not many will be going to the camp...
Hope that last minute ppls can turn up a few more minutes earlier...
40 ppl...can be fun...
But 60 ppl...can be more fun...
Wow...
It's 1am aldi...
Guess I really should be an owl now...
My eyes are still light and bright...
My mind is still...well...dumb and stupid as well...lol...

Juz came back from the BBQ party at Angel's house...
Wad a boom it was...
Well...
Got some bruise during the really very completely painful game of....Hit-you-with-the-bottle game...
Anyway...I accidentally broke one of the chairs...BY ACCIDENT...didn't noe I was tat heavy already...XD...Still feel a little bit pain at my butt...feels like I got kick in the ass...but hey...new experience...I nvr got kicked at the ass...
It was really fun...really crazy...really happy...really high...Everyone was enjoying themselves...
But the harsh reality hit us all back when we started to sit down and chat...
Shian Lin...the most crazy girl in our class I guess...is leaving us next year...will surely miss her wonderful yet ear piercing shouts...XD
Chi Hong...even tho I don't like being sex abused by him but...he is a gud fren tat we don't want to leave...leaving us for next year as well...
Jia Chen...the china boy...your "poems" are quite impressive...but I couldn't say the word "keep it up"(those who noes noe wad I mean)...will miss ya...
Jun Xiao...another china boy...even tho we only spent one year together...but once a fren...always a fren...will miss ya too pal...oh ya...u still haven't confirm leaving lolx...
But hey...we are all separating next year...
Those who chose to walk the path of science stream...
N those who chose to go accounts...
I will truly really miss...this 3 years...
For we are really a wonderful class...
We are gud at almost everything...anything...including the bad things tho...XD
Our 3 years weren't wasted in the end...
We wrote a splendid history together...
And left behind magnificent footprints...
LOVE YA J3F(09)!!!

I rmb this feeling...yet I can't describe it by words...
It's like magnetic poles holding each sides back...
I don't know what direction it eventually goes...
Everything...feels like nothing...
My whole mind has gone numb...
Im tired of this crap...

Missed a few dayz of band practice...feels kinda guilty for it...but hey...it's me body's problem not my mind...That what comes after you played a whole 48 hours...No more voice...No more energy...Im begining to think that I should be an owl...Now I can't sleep at nite...And Im really tired in the morning SOMETIMES...yet sometimes I don't feel anything at all...
My emotions are suddenly too low...Finally...I finally rmb this feeling...Everytime after a camp...or vacation...or something like a party...or juz being with a crowd of people...this is the feeling I get after these...empty...quiet...silence...nothing...
Well...it's normal actually...after a few dayz...I'll get myself back...

Im getting really really forgetfull these dayz...I wonder if it's bcuz of juz finishing a big exam...My whole mind seems to went for vacation...lazy to think somemore...LOL...
Now I rmb something I forgot...the pics...haven't posted it up...btr write it down or else I will forget AGN...

*Haven't watch 2012 yet!!! ARGH~~!*

Tomoro be my dear Mummy's birthday!!!

Well...
For the whole story of my class' first and last vacation trip together...
Im really really lazy to put it all up...
Pictures will be coming soon...

Okay...
Juz one special thing that happened at the trip...
We have a water polo game at first day...which was yesterday...
It's ROOM 2 vs ROOM 1 & 3...Xiao kia....
We were really outnumbered...
Oh ya...
Im in room 2...
Each room consists of 8 ppl...
so...
Its 8 against 16...
Wonderful~! Juz wonderful~!
Before we came swimming...we went to the obstacle course...
It was nice...N I used up much of me energy...
So...
When we were about to jump in the pool...
I didn't think of warming up since juz now was more than warm ups...
I was about to pay for being lazy...
I was juz swimming around...fast as I could...
Then...
The first cramp hitted me...on the right leg...
The first person in the pool to get cramp...
Lots more followed my lead...
The lots are from me team...mostly...XD
So...
Thank the Lord that our class has a former Saint John member...Octopus
And...A fully qualified life-saver in our class...Timun...^^
They saved me from the cramp...
So...
I was back in action not more than 15 mins...
Jumped back in,...
Threw more balls...
Then...
Second cramp hitted me...On the left leg...
Then its the whole "leg-saving" thing all over again...
After recovering from the hit...
Me and Shao Wei (who was as well one of the cramp team) decided to go back earlier since our legs juz can't play well...
I forgot that our room had the aircond on-ed for half of the day...
The whole room is like my fridge....
And both of me legs got cramp again....bcuz of the cold mostly...
With quite a distance from Timun and Octopus...
Shao Wei...and Birdy...was handed the job of helping me...
The whole proccess was both funny and painful...
Ask them...Then you'll know wad happened...
I laughed in pains...
Laughed and laughed and laughed...
When my leg's cramp was gone...
My face got another cramp bcuz of me laughing too long...in the cold...

I'll never forget this cramp-ing day in my life...
4 cramps in a row...How can life get any better...

Lolz...
Feel like typing...
But nothing in mind to type...
Or izit me can't express my feelings???
Sunday...
Can't go to church...
Cuz I will be going to PD with class...
2 dayz 1 nite...
The first and last outting with my class...
The first and last nite sleeping with my class...
Wow...
It all seems like yesterday when I first set foot in this skul...
Tat time I haven't even reach 170cm in height...
Tat time I haven't have the feeling of doing my hair...RIDICULOUS HAIR TAT TIME...
Tat time I haven't even learn to make frenz...
Tat time I haven't see this day...this last day of wearing wad I hated the most...Short! White! Pants!...
Now...
I wanna wear it longer...
Juz for a bit...
One more day to spend together wif my classmates...
Together...
Class stand...
Bow...
Thank you teacher...

I still remember the first few weeks when I started studying in this skul...
Whenever I have the time to daydream...
My mind kept on flew to how quick this will be...
I kept on feel like it will only be dayz to J3...
Then on will I go to senior...
Then on will I wear...long pants...
Then on will I climb the long and tiresome stairs...
It really really felt like yesterday...
Or juz last week....
But all has past...

Dang...Im being so moody these few dayz...
Wad has gotten into me???



Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path. (Ps 119:105)
O lord...
Continue to shine upon my way...
Light up the valleys...
Be my guidance in this stormy world...
Without you...
There will be no me...
You...
Are my Lord...

Yikes...
Watch Tsunami agn...
But this time with the deleted scenes that the cinemas didn't show...
Major drop on my emotion scale...
Kinda wanna cry out loud...
Ok...
Exaggerating...

Well...
after the show...
I went back to continue devouring the last book of Pendragon...
Well...
Big ending...
And at the big endings of the big novels written by big author published in big scales read by me big reader...
Big drop on the emotion scale agn...
Well...
These are all fictions...
But...
When you are really into it...
You really flow with the storyline...
I hate it when it comes to the end...

Talking about end...
Today be my last day of wearing short pants to skul...
Even though I really really hate wearing short pants...especially the skul's white tight wans...
Kinda miss it...
Last day...
Last book...
Last chance...
Bye bye junior...
Nvr in another lifetime will I come back agn...

Today got my report card...
Wow...
Ain't that bad after all...
But it's really obvious that year start I was only playing...
My score was like shit...
But it's more obvious that the 2nd semester I chiong-ed...
Jump over 10 place...
But...eventually the year start's score pulled me down...
Well...
After going in AC stream...
Betta do more hard work..
Since everyone wanna take their honeymoon...
I will chiong more ahead...
IF I CAN DO TAT...LOL...

Two dayz liao...
Didn't come to my blog to update...
Adui...
These few dayz too sleepy...
Too tired...
Kinda overslept everytime...
I slept from 4pm to 4 am...
Skipped my dinner oso...
Btr change my lifestyle a bit...
This is killing me...
Wake up early in the morning but can't get back to sleep...
Then when I tot of coming online to blog...
The wireless seems to have some problems...
Can't get online...
I have to use another line...(Dunno whos line is this)...to come online to blog...
Hope he doesn't come and ask for the money...

This is a really busy holiday...
Not the kind of relaxing holiday...
Too much to do...
There's a concert at 18th Dec...
Im back at the position of selling tickets...haiz...
Then there's a camp for the band...
Im at the position of vice president...lotz of work since president will be going for SPM...
Then there's the Youth Camp...
Im the secretary...Lotz of mail...meeting reports...Means lotz of nite awake too^^
Dunno this holiday for me to recharge or for me to use up my batteries faster...
Hope tat I can rest more as well...

Later will be going to skul to get report card...YIKES!
Then...
It'll be adios amigos to junior...
Actually we did tat yesterday...
Well..
Official graduated from Junior High...
Today...
I will register a spot for Senior High...
Exciting life awaits me...

K...
Btr not use this unknown line for too long...

Today was quite...plain...
Chinese teacher told us wad really happened yesterday...
During the discussion of the judges...she was there...
And...
She heard some things...
Our class was actually tied off with the 2nd place...
We were nearly knocked off...
GOOOD THING....
We had 4 parts in this choir...
Which gave us a heck of advantages..
AND...
We ain't doing alot of flowery...and even disturbing side effects...
Which was the main factor why we got 1st...
Now...
I was actually nominated for the best conductor award...
But chinese teacher didn't say much about tat...
Still...
Now...
A big question mark hangs on top of my head...
Am I suitable...
For conducting...
My confidence is falling...
Fast...
Waves and waves...
Shots by shots...
Coming and coming...
Towards me...
Juz when I committed myself to conduct...
Things...juz came...

Well...
Letz hope the question mark doesn't hang on there for too long...
I want answers....
I really need answers...



This is a really hard road to walk...
You can only be the best to walk this road...
Or you will be kicked out...

I can't believe Im this tired...
I went to slept right after I came back from skul...
Didn't know that I will sleep this long...
From 5pm something...
Til now...
Skipped my dinner...
Skipped my favourite tv show as well...
Now...
In the middle of the nite...
Im well awake...
But it's only 5 in the morning...
I can only wait for the sun to come out now...

Still so many ahead...
Now I think that UEC isn't an ending...
It be the start of another busy life...
At senior 1...
I really...really...need to lie down...
N get ready for the next 3 yrs of amazing life...

Well...
We've made it...
We've got the last glorious moment TOGETHER!!!
We've proved to be the best among others...
We are J3F!!!

Thank you all...
For listening...
For giving advice...
For cooperating...
N...
For being in this big part of the family...
Thank you all...



Not really in the mood of details...
Juz happy for our recent winning...
J3F da best!

Tomoro...
Be the day...
Many has been waiting for...

Before big occasions happened...
Some small yet disturbing things do happen sometimes...
Things so disturbing that may affect the big occasions...
Don't let satan have his chance...
Before going on the battlefield already fighting own people is the dumbest thing to do...
But nowadayz...
Ppl do tat...
However we still have the chance of standing back up...
Stand back up against the enemy...
Hold up our confident heart...
Forget everything...
And juz accomplish the mission...

J3F...
I noe...
Deep in my heart...
We are still a class...
And...
We can do it...
+U.....

Slept too much for nap...
Now my eyes are wide open...
Nth much to do now...
Tomoro will be a busy day though...
Gotta go clean the toilet...lolx...
It'll be fun I guess...It's all boyz!!!
When a group of boyz do something together at the same time...same place...things will get crazy...especially in the toilet...
Old Scottish Melody...
An old song...But a whole lot nicer than the new wan...
It's melody is the same with 友谊万岁...
But it's arrangement is whole lot better...
Glad coach thought of it...Don't wanna play a boring song for the graduates...
Tomoro we'll nid to play it for an hour or so...
Wow...
I juz got on 1st for 3 dayz??? And I juz came back from exam to play at band for...3 dayz oso???
My clarinet SUCKS...*not the instrument...the player...that would be me...*
I suck...*sigh*
But I know...
My skill will come back...
My passion will light up again...
IF!!!
I practice...^^


How great is our God...
Sing with me...
How great is our God...
All will sing...
How great...How great...
Is our God...
You are the name above all names...
You are worthy of all praise...
And my heart will sing...
How great...
Is our God...
*taken from the song [How Great is Our God]*

Juz how great is He...
How magnificent...
How wonderful...
I can feel His love for me everyday...
How???
Cuz I can see everyday!!!
I am blessed with life for everyday...
Not juz life...
But all the good...
Juz how great is He?

Finally...
My eye lids have some weight on it...
Nitezzz

Tru God's blessings...
Our class got in the finals...
It was really something...
The other form 2 choirs were real good...
But most of 'em were juz performing...not singing...
6 outta 10 i guess were juz using their costumes...boards...this...that...flowery things to get the marks...
I say...they got their full 10 marks for the creative section but threw their 30 marks of music...=p
But anyways...
They were really GOOD...
But...
We were better!!! XD
It's a really hard job for the judges to choose out 5 classes to enter the finals...So they made a decision to let more class in...
The announcement of the classes to enter the finals was really really scary...When they started to announce all of us in the canteen was like suddenly quiet...He first said J2X...then J2X....then J2x agn...then another J2X...(there should be only 5 classes chosen to enter the finals...Im saying according to the sequence)...Then...Wad we tot was the last...J2x...My heart dropped...I guess many from our class dropped their heart as well...Juz when we were about to faint...The announcement continued...And another class was reported to enter the finals...J2@...ANOTHER JUNIOR TWO CLASS!!! Altogther 6 classes!!! Then I was like...OMG OMG OMG...Plz CONTINUE!!! Then it really did!!! "The next class entering the finals is....J....3....Y...." There is hope!!! "Last but not least...J........3..............F!!!" Then it was all black......

Well...we made it into the finals...
But wad now?
1st place is like...wow...
There for us to grab...

*Note to self...*
No1.Dun stand too near to the stage end...You nearly fell off the stage today...Yikes...
No2.Rmb to tell Shao Wei...You will look at him then nod...THEN ONLY the song starts...
No3.Your butt looks ridiculous...Heard it frm someone...XD
No4.Rmb to turn the lights on your hat you dumb...
No5.Continue to put yourself in the music...Dun care about the audience...XD
Lastly...but not least...Enjoy...The last time with your class!
DUN FALL OFF THE STAGE!!!

Emotion...
Y is there emotion...
Emotions are linked to feelings...
Feelings are linked to thinking...

Y is there happy...
Y is there sad...
Y is there anger...
Y is there bored...
Y is there scare...
Why?!
It's there...
From the begining...
Till the end...
It will still be there...
Feelings affects our actions...
Feelings affects our words...
Feelings affects quite much thing....
Sometimes...We should follow our feeling to do something...
Sometimes...We shouldn't follow our feeling...but control it...
Control feelings...
Or should I say...
Control emotions...
Basically ...EQ...

I was following the plan...tat I have made...teaching the choir...juz according to the plan...But...I couldn't really get into the situation...Cuz there's something bothering me...My emotions...I was desperate...for nothing...Maybe there was something...but I couldn't sense it...I saw the emotions of my singers...Some of them eager to sing...But some of them eager to give the opinions...their way...their music...I wasn't really not fond of it...But...I was standing in front...It was quite disrespectful...I learn to control my emotions...pressing it down...listening...TRYING DESPERATELY to listen to every last advice given...It was difficult...With only 2 ears...N one big mind tat already have the picture of wad should I do...My music...Was continuously said...said...said...n said...My whole picture of the music...has totally ruined...I lost my OWN direction...So I stop the first session earlier...
It was a gud thing tat my art teacher was there...Well...He was into arts...Music is a kind of art as well...juz different...One more simillar thing is he is a teacher...I am oso teaching...After listening to his advice...I feel a bit more relief...I was totally not in the mood of eating...chating...Luckily Hui Min asked me to go to the band room...to stress out...She was a listener...A few advice given oso...*Im really still a learning conductor...About beautiful conducting...Tat should be about experience*....
I made a prayer to God...Asked Him to open my mind...Inspire me...N most of all...Be with me...All the time...
Second session started off smoothly...I was really into it already...Juz only when Shao Wei makes a mistake...The ending I made was a bit slow...So I called Hui Min to make it faster...Then suddenly...XX has something to say...XX says tat it should be ''something''...I was really trying to listen to her...Trying to understand wad was she saying...With all the noise and confusion... A misunderstanding occured...I still rmb I even shouted to quiet the choir...juz to listen...But then she was already angry already...FOR NTH???!!!
Gud thing at tat moment the bell sorta gone rite at the perfect moment...I walked to XX's seat and tried to understand wad really was she saying...But all XX said was.......
"You always act like the pro wan...N dun ever listen to other opinions..."
Those words really stabbed me...
I was following my own plan...
I was following my way of music...
Juz being me...Is tat a wrong?!?!
Frenz told me not to bother...My own mother oso told me to do tat...
Someone even told me...tat now tat Im the conductor...I should BE the conductor...Without ONE person giving the main ideas...The situation would be more chaotic...

Stick to the plan...Joe...
Juz stick to it...

How to make a band play nicer...
How to make a choir sing better...
How to make a song sound more beautiful...
How to make myself more into the song...
Critics has started to come...
Juz at the start of my conducting...
Should I move on...
Or should I move away...

I now taste the true flavour of conduct...
It combines the essences of sweet...bitter...sour...sometimes tasteless...
I've been learning to listen and order at the same time...
It's really hard...for a starter like me...
But I really wanna head on...this way...
I really wanna learn...
I really wanna conduct my own song...
I really wanna go in my own style..
My own way...
Music...A kind of art which not all might enjoy with you...
Music...A really blurry type of art which ones mind muz be right to know the true meaning of it...
My music...isn't really enjoyed by everyone...
Wads the reason?
Bcuz it's juz different ears...
Different music in the hearts of theirs...
Then another question pops out in my mind...
How to make the music...Everyone loves...
Classical...Loved by high education-ed
Pop...Loved by the most
Jazz...Loved by the ones who know it
Blues...Loved by the ones who do it...
Dance...Swing...Rock...Hard metal...Rap...etc etc etc...
So many kinds of music...
But not one of it...Is enjoyed by EVERY LAST PERSON ON EARTH...

It's monday already...
The competition is on friday...
There is only 3 dayz left for practice...My class progress is now in a steady pace...We are now tyring to make the dynamics come out...N more trying to make the voice sound more beautiful...The girls in our choir has a really wonderful voice already...No problems there...The only problem is with the boyz...Only a few has the correct sound...But I trust at the end...They will be right...
Today...I finally heard my bass' voice come out...They finally made it to hold the structure...My base is more stable...Now it's with the appearance of my song...I have been listening and listening to the song from when I started to write this blog till...dunno...lolz....I am starting to get the hang of conducting...But...Someone said my conducting isn't really beautiful...Actually someone said it was really ugly...I don't understand...I was juz following my instincts...No...Wait...I was following my feelings...My feelings...Connected with the song...Well...Half connected perhaps...Shao Wei still haven't got the hang of the chords...Keeps on putting out the feelings for the song...When the singers were about to enter the song...Shao Wei hits a wrong note...N more...Said sry... I mean...there's nth wrong about tat..Asking him to learn this song in a weeks time without any basics for chord is really not fair to him...I shouldn't make him feel bad...But instead at this kind of time...I should really support him...Give him confidence...Only 3 dayz left...I really need his feeling as well...
I have been trying to keep up on writing a blog everyday...Y? Bcuz a few dayz ago...I was a bit boring...Then my blog came into my mind...I went to see back my older post...Then I found out the little bits of me in the past...Little mistakes tat I shouldn't make again...or...Things tat i should keep on doing...It's quite interesting reading the past...even if it is about mysef...These are my footprints in the stream of time...

So...
3 dayz left...
Day 1...tat will be tmr...Learn the correct way of singing from Xue Yi and Qiu Rong...Then practice the parts...Combine...should teach them the dynamics already...
Day 2...Thursday...Continue to learn the singing ways...Parts will take only 5 mins...Then off to combine...More on combine practice...Cuz there's no more time left for the details...Continue to bring out the feelings...Feel real...Feel the song...
Day 3...Friday...Oso the competition's eliminating round...If we can pass the first round...Then I should think of more interesting...Creative ideas for the song...For now...stick to the plan...Friday...No need for singing basics...Head straight to part practices 5 mins...Then quickly start the combine...Emphasize on the feeling and performance...Facial expression isn't crucial...But the feeling muz be there...Rmb...Happy...Merry...Christmas...We are giving presents...on stage...

This will be the practice time table for the last 3 day...Hope nth goes wrong so I can stick to the plan...Gambateh J3F...God bless us all...

Another month passed...
Entering the ending of this year...
Then I start to think back...
Look back...
Rewind back...
To all the dayz behind me...
I see mistakes...
Falls...
Failures...
But those are only the dots...
On the big white board...
Wad is the big white board???
It be the blessing through out the year...
I found that everyday...I was filled with blessing God gave...
Cuz everyday...is a blessing already...

It's time to end this year...
Time to end my junior life...
It's time to start a new year...
Time to start my senior life...
This is why our eyes are in front...
To look to the future...
And put our past behind...
It's time to draw the perfect full-stop...